For some reason our society has this belief that holding our children will somehow spoil them. I beg to differ and so does Anthropologist, Dr. Ashley Montagu who sadly passed away in 1999. He left behind the book Touching: the Human Significance of the Skin.
Dr. Montagu states, “The language of the senses, in which all of us can be socialized, are capable of enlarging our appreciation and of deepening our understanding of each other and the world in which we live. Chief among these languages is touching. The communications we transmit through touch constitute the most powerful means of establishing human relationships, the foundation of experience.”
From the time our little ones are born we have people telling us: “you are holding him/her too much”…..”he/she won’t be able to reach significant milestones if you hold him/her so much”…..”you are allowing him/her to control you because now he/she thinks he/she must be held all the time”……etc. My response to the concerns I hear from parents is:
WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO? WHAT IS YOUR MOTHER’S (OR FATHER’S) INTUITION TELL YOU IS BEST FOR YOUR CHILD?
The parent is the only expert in regards to their own child. As parents we might be able to find useful information by reading books, attending parenting seminars and talking with our friends and family but the bottom line is that we must make the decision that is best for our own child(ren). We will be the ones to live with the outcome.
As the mother of 9 children, I beg you to make your own choices. Learn from the mistakes of others but most importantly heed the intuition that was given to you at birth. It will not lead you astray…..
“To be tender, loving, and caring, human beings must be tenderly loved and cared for in their earliest years, from the moment they are born. Held in the arms of their mothers [and fathers], caressed, cuddled, and comforted.”
– Dr. Ashley Montagu
To learn more about Dr. Ashley Montagu, click here.