I really never dreamed about being a midwife. When I was 5, people would ask the question, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” and I’d quickly answer, “a mommy” and then they would ask, “Don’t you want more than that?” and I’d wonder what in the world could possible be MORE than being a mommy.
I’m now the mommy to 9 (NINE!) beautifully amazing human beings!! I have no regrets in my life….not a single one. Not even a birth or breastfeeding regret. I made the decisions and I take full responsibility for them. I believed that ALL women were the same as me…..I was wrong.
December 26, 2000, I gave birth to a glorious little boy – Jacob – and the breastfeeding struggle began. This time, I learned about La Leche League. As I sat in La Leche League meetings learning what I didn’t know I didn’t know I continued to have no regrets about my experiences. After all, you can’t regret making past choices when you did so based on the information you had at the time. I didn’t feel betrayed. I didn’t feel denied a right of passage. I surrendered to the truth….
I didn’t know what I didn’t know and now that I knew I would do better. That’s all any of us can do, right?
As I sat in those La Leche League meetings I began to learn a different truth. The truth that other moms were living. A truth that I had no idea existed for anyone, and my heart sank. Could I help them? I mean, NO WOMAN should ever enter motherhood feeling the way some of these gloriously wonderful women were feeling. HOW in the world were they to be the emotionally stable and fully engaged mom their little one(s) desperately NEEDED them to be?
I began searching within and without for answers. What could I do that would keep me living my dream of being a mommy while also supporting other mommies along their emotional healing? Better yet, was there a way for me to STOP the emotional damage from occurring in the first place? At first I thought the answer was to become a La Leche League leader. I could serve as a volunteer in my community; teaching women about breastfeeding and how to conquer the “common” challenges.
Sadly, those “common” challenges had a cause. The cause was how the birthing process happened. So I decided that I could serve women best by being a childbirth educator and teaching women – or rather REMINDING women – that they are DESIGNED for birth. They are PRE-PROGRAMMED for birth. It was VERY fulfilling to teach about the natural birthing process. There was a high unmedicated birth rate among my clients. Breastfeeding happened almost flawlessly….of course. BUT…..
Women were still being abused during the birth process in the hospital. I served some women as their birth doula and left in tears….broken….worried and wondering HOW in the world could I possibly do THAT anymore. I stopped serving couples who were planning hospital birth and it felt awful. I felt as though I was giving up on women and I knew that continuing to serve them in the hospital meant that I would have to accept being complicit in what would happen to them there.
I WOULD NO LONGER BE COMPLICIT
I took time off from birth even though it never fully left me. Women who know me well continued to contact me for my advice and opinion on a variety of birthy things. I decided that the only way for me to truly give women the space where the birthing process would unfold naturally was to become a midwife. Everything I do is based in the scientific evidence; after all isn’t that what we’ve all been told is “the best” care? Evidence-based care? Sadly, there aren’t many actually offering evidence-based care and couples don’t always take the time to discover what “evidence-based” care even looks like.
So I sit and watch as birth unfolds. I wait. I emotionally support her and her sweetheart AND the life inside her. I only do what I NEED to do. I have witnesses to attest to that fact. You might wonder why I say that….there are many serving birthing women who say one thing and do another. I only do what NEEDS to be done; no more, no less. I respect the process; I respect the HUMAN BEINGS involved.
And yet it still doesn’t feel as though I’m doing enough. Every single day I hear about more women nearby and far away who are fighting for what is rightfully theirs. Women who are coming out of birth emotionally broken, traumatized and wanting nothing more than to be heard.
I HEAR YOU AND I AM RESPONDING!
I can do more. I can serve more than my local community. I can serve more than my clients. I can show you how to release the emotional garbage that you’ve been working on since your last birth or perhaps even before you ever conceived a child. Perhaps you haven’t yet been able to conceive a child. Those emotions CAN be surrendered to and released. I don’t believe that any of us should ever accept a negative emotional state. Surrendering is not accepting.
Our emotions drive the greatest part of us as human beings. It’s true whether you like it or not and whether you believe it or not. Your emotional state is intricately intertwined with your physical state. You were DESIGNED that way.
My purpose is to heal women and thereby their families and future generations from emotional trauma – birth or otherwise. To show women how to strengthen and protect themselves emotionally DURING pregnancy AND to show women who have not yet given birth OR who are finished with their birthing how to strengthen and protect AND heal from past emotional traumas in order to emotionally heal the world for many generations to come.
What you learn you can teach to your children – to your daughters and daughters in law – as well as to your grand-daughters, nieces, and every other woman you come in contact with.
We cannot emotionally heal the world until we emotionally heal women. We are the gatekeepers to the emotional stability of the generations to come.
Contact me now and let the healing begin!